Friday, 25 April 2008

scream.

the sound i hate most, is the sound of screaming. of people screaming at one another, of a mother losing control of herself and screaming incessantly at her children. I was rudely distracted by a mother screaming at her child in the neighbourhood close to 11pm. i couldn't really make out what the crying and pleading child was screaming, but the mother just kept going, "I need to go to work now!" over and over, and the heartwrenching cries of the child continued. The mum was screaming so hysterically that there were instances when the screams were noise without words. Bloodcurdling. I thought there might be murder soon. One whole hour of that drama.

I found myself clenching my fist as i hear the screams continue, in part out of fear, in part out of anger. Whatever can justify this display of frustration?

I find it very hard to forgive mothers who emotionally abuse their children. Very. I have almost a hatred for that kind of irresponsibility. A child who grows up with this kind of abuse, even if it was only for a night, will bear the scars of it deep within the heart for the rest of his or her life. The trauma of it all is irreversible. If you are a parent, you have every responsibility to love your child, whether or not it was your choice, whether or not it's your biological child, whether or not you feel up to it. I'm very upset.

This is yet another reminder that when the time comes, I want to be a good mother. A mother who loves, a mother who disciplines, a mother gentle with her children but strong in the Lord.